Four-Way Stops: When is it Your Turn?

I’m sure you have found yourself at a four-way stop before. You’re cruising down the road completely in control until you slowly wind down to that sudden… stop.

What happens next?

The rules of the four-way stop often seem to fly out the window, especially when you’re faced with three other drivers all wondering the same thing.

Did I get here first?

Do I make the first move, or nervously wait for everyone else to take control?

Some days you might feel empowered to step on the gas and command your way through the intersection. Other days you might patiently wait, feeling that everyone else is more deserving to take the opportunity than you. You’re afraid to create waves, to step into a space of action until you’re ready. When it comes to decisions in life, everything is circumstantial. Our mood, energy, and priorities ebb and flow on a daily basis. They create shifts in how we show up in the world every day.

As a woman, especially moving into midlife, it can feel like you’ve mastered the art of self-sacrifice. Does there ever come a time where you say, this is my moment? This is when I take action for myself because I finally have the right of way?

At a four-way stop, you have to wait your turn. But when that moment does come, you move forward with confidence because it’s what you deserve. It is important for everyone, especially moving into the new year to think about what your four-way stop is.  Is it present in your personal life, family, career, mindset?

Maybe you’re moving to a different state, leaving friends behind, or getting to the end of the road of an old relationship. When you envision a four-way stop, your perspective broadens. The situation is no longer one-sided, but a synergistic experience viewed from multiple lenses. We all have a deep-seated intuition.  Sometimes we just need a little nudge to reconnect with the answers inside us.

Life isn’t linear, it’s a crazy spiral of moments we rarely foresee coming. When you do reach that fork in the road, I want you to move forward with confidence. Whether it’s a big life decision, a ‘pipe’ dream you’ve been delaying, or a stressful dilemma that makes you stop for a minute.

Think about the person you want to be at the four-way stop, and start showing up for yourself. Patience is important, but you won’t become who you truly want to be if you stay stuck on the sidelines. I encourage you to dig a little deeper inside and think about that four-way-stop moment.

Who are you going to be, from this moment forward?

Where are you going to go from here?