Change the clocks, change your life


We are all beyond ready to move ahead this spring for obvious reasons, but it will be bittersweet for me as I lost my mom at the beginning of this month. Her strength, dedication to family and tenacity throughout her 95 years will continue to inspire me to move forward. As I posted last year on her birthday, of the many things I learned from her, one is to get things done right away, don’t stress over it, just do it, because stressing about something makes that task doubly hard. With that in mind, please see my blog below about #FOMA.


On March 14 we moved the clocks ahead one hour. We remember this as “spring ahead,” and I urge you to spring ahead yourself. Don’t suffer with “FOMA.” 


FOMA? Don’t I mean #FOMO, the emotion that justifies going to a party (at least in a pre-COVID world) when you should be sleeping, ordering the fruity umbrella drink your friend is having when all you want is a seltzer and lime, and splurging on the Lululemons when you are on an Old Navy budget? The hashtag with nearly 700,000 posts on Instagram?


Nope, I mean #FOMA–the Fear of Moving Ahead.


𝐹𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝑜𝑓 𝑀𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐴ℎ𝑒𝑎𝑑–𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑣𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑟𝑒ℎ𝑒𝑛𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑠𝑢𝑐𝑐𝑒𝑒𝑑 i𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑡𝑎𝑠𝑘 𝑛𝑒𝑐𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑎𝑟𝑦 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑑𝑣𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡, 𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑓𝑎𝑖𝑙 𝑤ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑚𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑝 𝑖𝑛 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑠.


FOMA can cripple us, and leave us stuck where we are. Especially during Covid when the future is uncertain.


Here is where you need to think about yourself a bit more. 


Don’t put off figuring out what comes next in your life just because others in your household are still trying to figure out what comes next in theirs–your husband deciding if he is going to go back into a busy office; your college students figuring out virtual learning; and your adult children deciding on a career change.


You don’t have to wait for them.


There. I said it. It’s out there. And it’s worth restating. 


Their ducks don’t have to be all in a row before you give yourself permission to address your own goals.


  • Turn your years of banking experience into an opportunity to give back by teaching financial literacy to adults in underserved communities. A call to a local community center or adult school would be a great starting point. 
  • Dig out those travel diaries, notes, and photographs from your incredible vacations and turn them into an actual online travel blog or Amazon self-published book.  
  • Get civic! Is it time for a big step up in your community with a run for the local school board? Or a seat on the sustainability committee or Zoning Board? You have more time and flexibility in your schedule, reach out to people you know who are active in the community to hone in on what would be the best fit for you. 
  • It’s never too late for a job change. Have friends and family told you that–at your age– it is wise to “stay put” at your current job and to not “rock the boat?”  Stop listening to naysayers who have ignored your dissatisfaction with your inability to move up the corporate ladder! Put out some feelers! Call colleagues. Update your LinkedIn. Check Indeed. 


And while #foma has 55,000 Instagram posts of its own, it’s not “our” FOMA. They are for a black/white art photography account having nothing to do with the Fear of Moving Ahead. Follow them if you want, but we will know the meaning of FOMA for an Empty Nester, and why it is so important to rip off that Band-Aid and declare this spring to be your time to move ahead.